The Coalition Approach To Flooding In The South West

You can’t help but feel we are stuffed when you look and see that Pointless Paterson and Useless Eustice are the ‘Men-In-Charge’ of our environment. Not quite as evil as some of the pairs we can think of, IDS and McViz along with Off-Shore Cameron and Gideon Osborne, but certainly right up there as the most incompetent pair around.

Having both made a total arse over the killing of badgers to please the farmers union they have been left in charge now of flood defences. Now when you put together two blokes who couldn’t run a bath between them the chances of them coping with the amount of water there is in the South West is just about zero.

The pair of them have made pitiful media photo-shoots to this part of the country to pretend they are doing something. Pointless Paterson left it until the proper pumps finally turned up after 6 weeks and then got a snot on because it was pointed out to him what a piss-poor effort he had made.


Pompous Pointless Paterson said, “I’ve come down personally to see the problem!” What was he expecting? A bloody medal? It’s your job you useless git! Did he expect the floods to be brought up to London for him to take a look? Bloody idiot. We couldn’t spot the missus, whose wages we also pay, but she may have been working hard at the pair’s home office.

Having clearly done nothing about flooding in his four years in the ‘job’ the cheeky git then told us that the locals can come up with their own scheme in the next 6 weeks. If he likes it, he meant “it costs bugger all”, he will finance it. Four years salary and all he can come up with is ask the locals for their ideas. Sack him and Eustice today, don’t mess about, sack them before we all drown in crap.


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